Trust is thought to be the foundation for every successful relationship. How to gain trust, and to keep it, is something that couples struggle with all of the time. Building trust may be one of the most difficult things that you face as a couple. You need to hear each other and be able to effectively spell out your needs. The most essential ingredient in trust is the honesty that it stems from.



Building trust takes time. It is essential to have trust before true intimacy can ever be achieved. At some point couples will need to share everything about themselves. This includes their past, their hopes, their fears and their hang-ups.

The more time you spend with your partner the more you will be revealing yourself. How you deal with work stress, a fight with your parents, even how to cope with a tight budget are all parts of who you are. The more you act honestly in these situations the more beneficial it can be for your new partner. This establishes a base so that when you act differently your partner can hone in on it and support you. Also, being honest allows your partner to accept and adore you for exactly as you are.

Communication, good and honest communication, is a key ingredient to building trust. If you are always jumping to conclusions or not listening to your partner the foundation of trust will crumble. The easiest way to communicate is to ask for explanations when you don¡¯t understand something. Take the time so that you know what your partner means. Listen to what they are saying and truly hear; share openly and fully. By communicating your feelings you show that you trust your partner with your heart. Above all else, communicate through love, and try not to assume the worst of your partner.

Fights are common in all relationships, and knowing how to fight fairly is another way to build trust. Stay away from calling each other names or insulting one another. Try not to be overly generalizing or point fingers. Always stick to the point and know when to walk away to cool off.

Don¡¯t expect to build trust overnight, it takes time. Many of us enter into relationships with cracks of damage from previous battles of the heart. If you or your partner is having continuous problems trusting, it might be time to seek outside help. Couples therapy is an excellent way for both of you to heal and come together.